Gin-U-Wine Hero

I talk a lot of shit on SEPTA. Between the unreliability, the surliness, the racism, and the smell, there's an awful lot not to like. But even I have to give credit where credit is due, and this dude is one AmEx Platinum Mofo. What do you want to bet that, even as he tore ass away from the scene, some dipshit passenger pulled the cord for his stop and got pissed when the driver wouldn't stop.

So Bravo, Malcolm. You can sideswipe my (imaginary) Prius any day.

side note - would this make him...

Send lawyers, guns, and Elmo?

Looking for a fun, family activity for this weekend?

Have you considered Sesame Place? No? What, do you hate freedom?

The only thing more American than overpriced theme parks smelling vaguely of urine is the 2nd Amendment.

Charlton Heston, also smelling of urine.

And the NRA is to the 2nd Amendment what Sesame Place is to family fun.

That's right. Right now, if you go to the NRA's website and donate funds, you can get free passes to Sesame Place. Of course, the tickets weren't purchased by NRA, but donated by Anheuser-Busch, which owns Sesame Place. Cause, after all, what's family fun and guns without booze? A day without sunshine, that's what.

Yes, no, yes.

Of course, Coors' right wing leanings have been well documented (even if the depth of their evil has been a bit exaggerated), but I wasn't aware that the makers of Budweiser also support the gun lobby. What will they say when they see their poster boy happily promoting a (shudder) craft brewer?

Side note: Flying Fish Farmhouse Summer Ale (pictured) is delicious.

So, your options for this weekend are clear:

Donate to the NRA, buy some Bud, and go to Sesame Place to work on your ulcer.

Donate to the FCNL, buy some Farmhouse, and go to the beach to oogle some boogles.

I trust you'll make the right decision.