Showing posts with label food review. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food review. Show all posts

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Food Report - Vintage

Stopped by Vintage, the new wine bar at 13th and Sansom last night for a couple post-dinner drinks. Here's a brief rundown:

Decor: A kind of musty off-yellow theme throughout, which, frankly, I didn't care for. It kind of felt like an old person's living room, updated to seem modern and trendy. Strange, and unsettling. Yellow light theme = bad skin tones. Plus, the bar is hideous- shellacked with a roughly hammered layer of aluminum or some shit, that has no place being anywhere but a conspiracy nut's helmet. What ever happened to simple, elegant wood under about 800 layers of lacquer? Was there a new fire ordinance passed? Finally, there's a bigass iron chandelier, with a single ugly bulb in the middle, and wine bottles arranged radially - which would look awesome in a more rustic, relaxed setting (as would the very nice and humongous wine racks behind the bar), but which didn't fit with the fancier appointments in the rest of the place. Overall, decor is confused, and not very successful.

Food: Didn't have any, but it looks good if not very creative. That said, they serve several dishes using an unbelievably poor method, which is a bigass rack that stacks three plates vertically, almost like your at afternoon tea in Britain. I didn't like this method then, and I seriously hate it now, served to a couple at a very small two-seater, such that they had to lean to the side to fucking see each other. This is the worst kind of stupid, pretentious shit that has no place in a quality drunkery.

Wine: Fantastic. World-class. Awesome. Pick a word. They were out of Carmenere, which was too bad, but I discovered a few others that were straight up great. A glass'll run you 9-10 bucks, but the service and quality makes it worth it (see below). One small problem was that the wine is served in glasses sporting the Vintage logo. I find this really stupid.

Dude:
"Damn, this malbec is great and all, but where the hell am I?"
(looks down)
"Oh, right! I'm at Vintage! Thank you, kind purveyor of booze, for alerting me as to my whereabouts. Now, pray, where might my pants be?"

Beer: Not great. A lot of generic euro pilsners, and of course the requisite belgian stuff you can get at every single other bar in the city, plus a few specials. The lone hop-lovers beer was Dogfish Head's 90 minute, which is maybe the most overrated beer on the planet. Stick to wine. They do have a rotating tap for something seasonal. I suggested they add Yard's Brawler when it comes out. Bartender looked at me like I had grown antennae.

Other booze: See above. Several ports and scotches available, but nothing all that rare to my untrained eye. Blah. But you're not here for that stuff anyway.

Service: In a word, phenomenal. Like every serious wine bar (and really, any bar period) should, they encourage tasting anything and everything. Much like a good cheese shop, they've realized that encouraging customers tasting different stuff encourages them to come back and buy more. Bravo. So head on over on a day when it's slow (Wed. night the place was dead), and spend some time sipping. Don't be shy. They'll happily chat with you about what they think of the wine (including an honest answer if they personally hate a particular wine). This is the model all bars should follow.

Overall, this place is great in the right circumstances, which is to say, go with a friend or two, for drinks and maybe a snack to share, belly up to the bar, and spend a couple hours tasting different stuff. Reward their generosity by ordering a glass or two of whatever tastes the best to you.
And if your food arrives in a goddamn tower formation, tell them to knock that shit off, deconstruct it, and hand the stupid rack back to them. They gotta learn.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Food Review – TIME

Head to head matchup between health code violator and beer drinker’s heaven, Ludwig’s Bier Garten, and TIME, which replaced it and opened last night.

Waitstaff
Ludwig’s: Hot hipsters and thickly-accented buxom European lasses in cleavage-baring dresses, who took forever to bring you your beer.

TIME: Villanova fratboys who take forever to bring you your beer.

Massive hetero advantage: Ludwig’s.
Massive extend-the-gayborhood-northward advantage: TIME

Bar surface
Ludwig’s: Ancient and somewhat decrepit wooden bar.

TIME: Cheap ass Ikea wood painted black.

Advantage: Ludwig’s

Décor
Ludwig’s: Soccer flags, peeling paint and picnic tablecloths

TIME: Rich mahogany and sleek modern tones.

Advantage: TIME

Beer list
Ludwig’s: The best German beer in the city, if not the nation. Only reliable source of Rauschbier in the city.

TIME: Decent, if less-than-unique collection, including a handful of the most common German, Belgian, and British beers, as well as a few American ales (incl. Bell’s Two Hearted, my current favorite).

Advantage: Ludwig’s

Other booze
Ludwig’s:
Marge: I'll just have a cup of coffee.
Bartender: Beer, it is.
Marge: No, I said "coffee".
Bartender: "Beer?”
Marge: [slowly] Coff-ee.
Bartender: Be-er?
Marge: C -- O --
Bartender: B -- E --

TIME: Whisky whisky whisky. Hoo boy do they have a lot of whisky. Much of it good. Granddad also available. Advice to TIME ownership – get a TIME take on the citywide special going – Granddad and a Yard’s Philly Pale = victory.

HUGE advantage: TIME

Price
Ludwig’s: Prohibitive, except during late night happy hour. The longer you stay, the more you can afford to get plastered.

TIME: Even more expensive than Ludwig’s. No late night happy hour.

Advantage: Ludwig’s.

Clientele
Ludwig’s: Ecclectic assortment, reflective of Philly as a whole (at least the white part of Philly). South/NE blue collar guys screaming at the Phillies, bike messengers and other assorted hipsters, lawyers. Of course, usually not that many people in general in the last year or two, as the crowd had moved to Good Dog.

TIME: Dooooooooooouche.

Advantage: Good Dog.

Food
Ludwig's: Delicious spetzel. Potato pancakes. Wurst.

TIME: Didn’t have it, but the bread comes with a revolting little tri-sectioned platter containing a piped flower of butter, a puddle of olive oil and a truly disturbing pile of a mustard-looking substance that would look more at home in a baby’s diaper than on a plate.

Advantage: Ludwig’s

The Final Countdown: Ludwig’s 4, TIME 2.