A quick dose of seething hatred

Wag of my dick goes straight at the US Army, for fucking up the mailing addresses of letters to family members of US soldiers killed in Iraq and Afghanistan, and referring to the men as "John Doe". Forget for a moment the crippling dehumanization that comes with having your dead mom, dad, husband, wife, son, or daughter labeled a John Doe, and think for a second about the arrogance and disdain it takes to outsource the writing of letters to families of dead fucking US soldiers.

Oh, Army chief of staff General Casey is now writing a "personal letter" to each of the 7,000 family members? I award you no make up points - you should have been writing these letters your damn self all along.

Look, anyone who has watched a single fucking Vietnam or WWII movie knows that the only way to save the General that led the dead soldiers to their sad fates is to show him agonizing over writing exactly these kinds of letters. Outsourcing that shit is so goddamn horrible, I don't know that Dante even thought up a level for it.

So, in short, fuck you US Army.

Optimism Comes in No Greater Form than the Humble Meatball

For visual evidence that I make some durn good ones, I present exhibit A:

Ingredients:

Ground turkey

Crushed red pepper

A fistful of fresh rosemary, minced

Cayenne pepper

Paprika

Carmelized onions, minced

Salt and pepper

Saute until golden brown on all sides (yes, in my kitchen, spheres have sides), finish in the oven covered in tin foil.

Serve over a big bowl of pasta, with the greatest tomato sauce in the world (recipe forthcoming), and a generous amount of parmigiano reggiano.

Now go vote!